Child rights defenders advise parents and guardians on how to peacefully talk with children about behavior in public so that young people’s leisure time with friends is not only fun but also safe, according to a statement from the State Child Rights Protection and Adoption Service to the media.
Teenage socializing is a natural and important part of their lives, but sometimes risky behavior can arise within the group. Child rights defenders receive reports when teenagers gather in abandoned buildings, get intoxicated, engage in violence among themselves or against others, disturb public order.
Child rights defender Marius Viltrakis notes that the most important thing is to try to understand what really lies behind such risky behavior of a teenager.
“Adolescence is a time when a child gradually separates from parents and learns to be independent, so sometimes their behavior may be driven by the desire to make more decisions on their own. In other cases, it may be important for the teenager to feel accepted among peers, so friends’ opinions and group decisions can become very significant. However, risky behavior is not always just about wanting to fit in – family tension, difficulties at school, or other experiences of the child can also influence it. The group of friends itself is not a problem. It is important for parents to be attentive, interested in the child’s daily life, their relationships with friends, and to nurture mutual connection,” says M. Viltrakis.
Prohibition does not always help – it is important to talk about consequences
According to child rights defenders, it is important to notice changes in a young person’s behavior. If a teenager becomes more withdrawn, spends more time with friends, starts ignoring family agreements, or chooses activities that cause concern, parents’ reaction in such a situation may be a desire to forbid, restrict, or set stricter boundaries as soon as possible.
However, M. Viltrakis advises to take the path of discussion rather than prohibitions, to discuss specific situations with the teenager and explain your concerns.
“Words like ‘don’t do it, you can’t, it will end badly’ are not preventive conversations. If a teenager comes to talk, it is important to listen, understand, accept, and advise. Sometimes a young person does not see all the dangers. So you can talk about the fact that the building itself may be unsafe, with old, unstable structures, and so on,” the interlocutor notes.
Thus, such mature conversations about teenagers visiting abandoned buildings, construction sites, according to the child rights defender, help not only to set boundaries but also to develop the teenager’s ability to take responsibility.
Read more Autonomous cars are entering Europe: it has been revealed when they will start carrying passengers
When risky behavior causes concern
However, if risky behavior repeats, intensifies, or threatens the safety of the child or others, it is important not to wait until the situation becomes more complicated.
Sometimes sincere interest, the opportunity to express thoughts without fear can be an important step toward safer behavior. But if the teenager’s behavior causes increasing concern, it is important to seek help before the problem becomes very serious. Talking can be helped by a psychologist, social worker, child rights defender, or another specialist best suited to the needs of the child and family.
“Sometimes a child needs clearer boundaries, sometimes more attention and connection, and sometimes the family may need specialist help. Even when the child’s behavior causes concern, it is very important that they know adults will not turn away from them,” notes M. Viltrakis.
When young people gathering in abandoned buildings make noise, use psychoactive substances, etc., upon receiving a report, child rights defenders first try to identify the youths with the help of the police. Then they find out what happened in the child’s life, communicate with the teenager, their parents or guardians, assess the family situation, investigate what difficulties are faced and what help could be most useful.
If necessary, comprehensive assistance can be provided to the child and family – social services, consultations with psychologists or other specialists, help in addressing psychoactive substance use problems.
If you have questions, we invite you to watch Child Rights TV or consult with child rights defenders by calling the free phone number 0 800 10 800, you can also write a message in the chat box on the website vaikoteises.lrv.lt. Reports of child rights violations can be made at the nearest child rights protection department, by filling out a form on the Service’s website, or by calling the Emergency Services number 112.
Read more Angelė Jakavonytė. Victims of occupations deserve greater social guarantees
