“We are really good at starting – presenting a new strategy, product, organizing impressive housewarming or wedding celebrations. But we very rarely think – how do we give meaning to endings?” asks P. Mačiulevičius.
Why are endings so important to a person?
P. Mačiulevičius shares that almost a century ago psychologist Bluma Zeigarnik noticed that people remember unfinished tasks much better than those they have already completed. Later studies showed that unfinished tasks remain active in our thinking.
“Keep in mind that such unfinishedness in life costs comprehensively – attention, trust, relationships. It consumes mental resources and does not allow a full switch,” emphasizes the expert.
He gives an example that after a divorce, often people look for someone to blame, but that does not help close this stage of life. According to the psychologist, another option is to consciously understand that the life path taken so far was meaningful, instructive, and good in some way, but a proper ending is needed for that.
“Unfortunately, most of the time we do not do that ‘closure.’ Emotions direct our attention to other things – to self-justification, defensiveness, possibilities waiting in the future. To learn from mistakes, they need to be analyzed. For example, the United States military has been using the ‘After Action Review’ method for many years, which in my opinion is suitable for organizations and everyday life. After each important operation, just a few questions are asked: what happened? why did it happen? what did we learn? what will we do differently next time? This allows not to lose the most important thing – accumulated experience,” says P. Mačiulevičius.
There are many endings in life
According to the expert, for one person an ending is a divorce, and for another – changing jobs.
“Following Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s model, when something ends, people often go through similar emotional states. First – denial (‘maybe nothing will change yet?’), later anger (‘why did it have to change?’), then bargaining (‘maybe we can keep at least part of it?’). Sometimes disappointment comes. And only then acceptance,” presents P. Mačiulevičius.
According to him, it is often easy to notice when a person successfully finishes one stage and starts another.
“For example, to smoothly change a career path, an athlete must admit that his body is no longer as capable, although the mind can and wants more. It is important to be able to accept your change, grieve it, and reorient to a different way of being. The same goes for retirement,” says P. Mačiulevičius.
Speaking about organizations, the organizational psychologist says he notices that leaders often start fighting employee resistance, although it is actually something else. “Sometimes leaders should simply help people finish what has ended. This is a completely different logic of leadership,” notes P. Mačiulevičius and presents four levels of organizational closure.
“The first is emotional closure. Did people understand that the stage ended? Did they have a chance to realize it? The second is relative closure. Did we thank? Did we appreciate people’s contribution? Did we say goodbye properly? The third is learning closure. What did this experience teach us? What will we take to the next project? The fourth is strategic closure. What do we consciously leave in the past? What habits, processes, or decisions do we no longer want to repeat?” lists the “Grand Partners” development partner.
He says he notices that in many companies projects end when the budget ends, not learning: “In organizations, an ending is often understood as an administrative action – a closed project, a signed document, a turned-off ‘Teams’ channel. But psychologically, the ending only begins at that moment.”
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A common mistake of leaders
P. Mačiulevičius highlights one common mistake made by leaders – thinking that a new project automatically cancels the emotions of the old one.
“It does not cancel. If a person did not say goodbye to the team, if there was no thanks for two years of work, if there was no reflection, all this travels together to the next project. William Bridges, the author of organizational change, said a thought that, in my opinion, should hang in every leader’s office: ‘Every transition begins with an ending.’ Not with a new strategy or a new leader, but with an ending. Change happens in the organization’s scheme. Transition happens inside the person. These two things should not be confused,” draws attention the expert.
According to him, the ability to properly finish shows the maturity of the organization.
“Sometimes I come to conduct training and see that five initiatives are happening at once – a new strategy, a new information system, reorganization, a change of leader, and another project. Then I ask people: ‘What have you consciously finished in the past year?’ Usually, an eloquent silence falls in the room. Not because people finished nothing. On the contrary – they worked a lot, but the organization was rushing so much to the next stage that it left no room for closure,” notes P. Mačiulevičius. “I think this is where fatigue arises. Not just because of the amount of work. Because of unfinishedness.”
Based on research, Gallup has been repeating an important message for many years: employee recognition and sincere thanks are among the strongest engagement factors. “Paradoxically, but it is precisely at the end of projects, when recognition would be most meaningful, that we often pay the least attention to it. Moreover, leaders often say they do not have time for reflection, when it is necessary. Done qualitatively and regularly, it becomes an important organizational ritual and an endless resource for learning and improvement,” asserts the expert.
He adds that Daniel Kahneman’s research shows that people remember experience not by its average. The greatest impact is made by two moments – the emotional peak and the ending: “This means that the last conversation with the leader or the last week of the project can have a greater impact than many ordinary working days.”
You need to know how to “land” safely
P. Mačiulevičius believes that life, like work, consists of “mini projects.”
“Often in personal life, the beginnings and endings of those ‘projects’ simply naturally overlap and nothing needs to be done about it. Still, if you feel emotional tension arises, then it is worth thinking about how you can properly ‘close’ each stage. Closure consists of me reflecting on what I learned from it, what I took, and how I feel that this thing has ended,” shares the psychologist.
For organizational leaders, P. Mačiulevičius thinks it is also worth asking yourself a few questions: how do you say goodbye to employees, close projects, celebrate victories, and give meaning to failures?
“In the mountains, the summit is not the end of the hike. Most accidents happen on the descent. In organizations and life, it is very similar. You need to know how to land safely – take the experience, thank people, and consciously let go of what has already done its job,” concludes the expert.
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