A Life-Changing Journey to Rome
“I went on a pilgrimage to Rome. In the church there, I met my future husband. I thought, if I met him in a church, it must have been destined by God and everything would be fine,” recalled Rūta.
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According to her, there were many beautiful moments in the relationship, but everything began to change when the couple started living together in Italy.
Rūta settled in the province of Lucca – in the mountainous town of Villa Collemandina. She said she found herself in an environment where an old-fashioned attitude towards women still prevailed.
“I was not allowed to work as an actress, my husband was very jealous,” she said.
Rūta arrived in Italy already raising her son Adomas, and soon became pregnant with her second son, Jokūbas. At that time, to avoid conflicts, the woman tried to adapt.
“To avoid conflicts and constant arguments, I adapted. I was only allowed to do simple jobs. To have my own money, I went to clean houses. The money was very little, but I wanted to have something of my own,” Rūta said.
Nevertheless, Rūta tried to preserve the family, looked for ways to change her life, and focused mostly on the children.
“I raised the children, devoted myself to motherhood and family. I thought: okay, this is a value. At that time, it was indeed a value,” said R. Papartytė.
The woman is open – both sons have been and still are among her greatest sources of strength.
“They are my meaning and strength. You do so much to create that well-being for your children and take care of them,” she said.
However, over time, Rūta realized another important thing – motherhood does not mean that a woman has to completely give up on herself or her life.
“Children are children, that is wonderful, but you must also have your own life, it was given to you for a reason. The development of children is very important, but I have to live my own story too,” the interviewee emphasized.
It was precisely the desire not to lose herself and to continue her own story that eventually led Rūta back to activities close to her while living in Lithuania. After learning about the woman’s professional experience, representatives of the Lucca theater became interested in her previous work.
After presenting her experience and resume, Rūta received an offer to teach acting skills and conduct creative workshops at the theater after learning Italian.
“But my husband was very jealous, he didn’t allow me to do many things, so I could express myself very little,” Rūta said.
After 13 Years, She Decided to Change
A very significant stage of her life began after thirteen years of living together, when Rūta decided to divorce.
“By law, I stayed at home with the children, but I had no financial resources, no money. My ex-husband did not help me financially at all. More precisely, he even hindered me,” the woman said, adding that even after the divorce she experienced great psychological pressure and harassment.
She Began Changing Her Life with Small Steps
“Then I really rearranged my life and thought: what can I do? How can I change my life with small steps, small habits?” she recalled.
The woman began to focus mostly on personal growth.
“I concentrated a lot on what I could do to not spare myself and not get involved in those conflicts. That’s how my journey began,” Rūta said.
She started changes with simple daily habits – sleep routine, more movement, sports, and self-care.
“When you start taking care of your body, you gain the strength to create that well-being,” R. Papartytė said.
Gradually, these changes brought more energy and encouraged Rūta to return more actively to professional activities. She began working in schools and implementing various projects.
“People found out about me, that I work well and am a high-level professional,” the interviewee rejoiced.
Now She Teaches in a Men’s Prison
Professional recognition and the courage not to give up opened completely unexpected opportunities for Rūta. One of them is working in a men’s prison in Italy. Here she gives lectures and prepares a play together with the inmates.
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“It really feels like a miracle to me,” the woman smiled.
According to her, this whole path showed how many new things can arise when a person dares to take risks, try, and move forward.
She said the work in prison confirmed this. At first, about 30 people attended her sessions, and soon even more wanted to join.
“They all said: ‘Rūta, you are so special, incredible, and strong.’ The next day I came – 16 new prisoners signed up,” she said.
In her opinion, people feel her energy, knowledge, and empathy.
“I saw how strong I can be. Each of us is like that. The most important thing is to dare,” the woman said.
The “1000 Women” Project Became an Important Impetus
Rūta was glad that the project, organized for the second year, significantly contributed to all this and gave her a lot of new knowledge, inspiration, and more confidence in her abilities.
“One thing – this project was free, it was a salvation. Another thing – the sessions were held remotely, which was very convenient for me. I received a lot of knowledge and information. I saw that everything is possible. It gave a lot of inspiration in every sense,” Rūta said.
Today, the woman’s professional life is already quite different from when she could only dream of returning to the theater.
Her life story interested a playwright who wrote a text based on it. A director from Lithuania also joined the creative process, and now preparations for the play production are gradually underway.
“Now we are moving towards staging a one-woman show. A very, very long road has been traveled,” Rūta rejoiced.
Moreover, the woman is happy that the project encouraged her to create and implement new ideas, teaching communication using theater methods.
One of her biggest challenges was a project implemented in Lithuania for social workers, for which Rūta prepared video lessons.
“I thought it was impossible. Oh God, how will this be? But I did everything alone – from content creation to all technical aspects,” the woman proudly said.
According to the interviewee, this project gave her the confidence to take on tasks that would have seemed too difficult before.
“When I saw the lecturers, I thought: God, I can do the same,” she recalled.
Rūta highly values the knowledge gained and the opportunity to learn from professionals in different fields.
“Very high-level lectures, many professionals who provide very valuable knowledge. It was really very interesting,” she said.
She believes that the opportunity to learn and improve is important not only for women going through difficult life periods.
“Even if there are no terrible hardships or difficult stories, growth and moving forward bring not only economic benefits. Self-esteem rises, you see meaning in life differently, and then you can share what you have with others and give more yourself,” Rūta said.
The woman says she lived for a long time with the fear that she simply would not be able to do some things. In a difficult situation, she said, a person may begin to feel that there are no choices left.
“In those difficulties, such inner doors close, it seems there is no way out and you can’t do anything. That fear paralyzes. I hesitated for many years precisely because of that fear that I can’t,” she admitted.
Practical training helped Rūta to trust herself more. “The project and new activities showed that I can. And I can do a lot,” R. Papartytė said.
She emphasizes that support from others is also important for change: “It is precisely those people who support you. The project was exactly the place that gave me inspiration because one person alone is not a warrior. You must definitely have a team.”
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